Chocolate, avocado, lime

Dessert: A Love Story

I'm in love.

With lime ice cream.  Sweet, tart, cold, smooth lime ice cream.  C'mere, you...

But, I have to confess: I am tempted to have a torrid, steamy, illicit affair with this lime curd:

Oh, lime curd... you wicked beast... what, with all your sugar and your eggs...

Oh, how you taunt me.  How you beckon me.  I mean, LOOK at all the BUTTER that went into you.  Oh, lime curd...

That's enough sweet, unsalted butter to make Paula Deen and Tony Bourdain get over their stupid Internet fight and come together in peace and harmony.

But am I willing to share my lime curd?  In its liquid form, no.  But after I dehydrated it for 56 hours (the book says it takes 12) and it still wasn't crisp and looked like pee-soaked drywall... the bloom was off the rose, my friends. Semi-dehydrated, kind of limp lime curd and I were over.

But, hey... who's that over there trying to make eye contact with me?  Trying to steal me away from the limes of my life?  Oh, well helllloooo there, chocolate mousse...

Look at you, all melty in the improvised double boiler.... trying to turn me all cliche like a Cathy comic...  Oh, and you over there... egg whites... what's that about wanting to be whipped...?  With some sugar?  I got your sugar....

And now you want to be gently folded in...?

Then lovingly spooned onto a dehydrator tray?  Why sure... I can do that... I got you, boo...

Who's your friend?  I think he's kinda cute, actually.  You're related?  I can see the resemblance.  Nice to meet you, pliable chocolate ganache...

I can't wait to slice you and curl you and bend you to my will.

But there's something over here I can't ignore.  Mint pudding.  Come over here, baby.  How you been?  I think you're kinda cool.  A little fresh, even...

You like it when I add xanthan gum and calcium ascorbate before whacking you around in the blender, don't you.  DON'T YOU.
 

Yeah, you do.

Someone's feeling a little left out, I can see.  Avocado purée, you're creamy and very nice, but I kinda just wanna be friends.  Is that okay?  It is?  Oh, good.  I'm glad.

I wonder if polyamory is okay in the dessert world.... 'cause I have fallen in deep, hard love with every single flavor in this dish... on their own, and all together:

Oh, and hey there, cocoa crumbs... I'm sorry I only have this one shot of you with the group.  But I'ma draw a heart around you when I put this picture up inside my locker so everyone will know how I feel about you.  MMMmmm....

Resources: Green & Black's chocolate and cocoa; 365 butter; Domino sugar; Smith Meadows Farm eggs; gelatin sheet, glucose, and sorbitol from L'Epicerie; agar agar, malic acid, and xanthan gum from Terra Spice; Natural by Nature heavy cream and skim milk; David's kosher salt; mint leaves from my garden; Now Foods calcium ascorbate; limes and avocados from Shoppers Food Warehouse; licorice extract from HerbalRemedies.

Music to Cook By: No Doubt; Rock Steady.  I don't know why, but I've been in a No Doubt mood the last few days. I love Tragic Kingdom, too, but had Rock Steady on loop most of the weekend. I hadn't listened to it in ages, and when it came out I didn't really love it.  Now?  It's grown on me.

Read My Previous Post: Pork Cheek, pumpernickel, gruyere, ramps

 

Comments

[David]

That lime ice cream is so smooth!!! What a beautiful plate.

[Erica]

I was laughing so hard that my coworkers came in and I had to (very lamely) explain why I had tears running down my face.

They didn't get it. Their loss.

That looks freaking delicious. Kudos.

[Karl Shea]

Maybe your dehydrating issues have been because you're using a dehydrator that actually is heating the food?

Alton Brown did an episode of Good Eats long ago where he was trying to make jerky, and he ended up using box fans and air filters. Maybe worth a try?

[Jean Marie]

I'm not sure that any lime curd would have survived to the drying stage around my house. I wonder if the ridiculously high humidity that we've had recently could have affected your dehydrating.

[amy]

i love this post. i read it to myself in sarah jessica parker ala Carrie Bradshaw's voice. C'mere, lovah.

glad to see you back.

[Pat]

Sugar slut...

[Linda]

That last picture looks more like an orgy than polyamory.

[Mali]

I love your blog! I find it something that I can read when I just want to sit down and read a really well written blog, oh and the dash of talking to your food all sexy-like? I love it!! Keep it up! It's definitely been worth subscribing. :)

[Jen @ Savory Simple]

Wow, what a gorgeous dessert!

[Jenn]

Brilliantly hilarious! I seriously needed to read that after spending all weekend with my family. No other blog makes me crack up like yours.

[Crude Dame]

I feel like I just read through an erotica novel involving sugar, and its promiscuous ways. Thoroughly enjoyed the writing and the end result looks absolutely mouthwatering!

[Oui, Chef]

I think I may have to buy the book JUST for this dessert. Lime ice cream will be my bad girl! - S

[Kevin]

This post brings the concept of food porn to a whole new level! I feel (edible-)dirty!

Thanks for sharing your novel dessert in an ingenious way.

[JSW]

Best AAH post ever!

[Culinary School: Three Semesters of Life, Learning, and Loss of Blood]

The lime - so gorgeous. I adore all things lime so much I made a lime curd at culinary school. Gorgeous stuff.

[Kelly]

Gorgeous. That looks like a beautiful dessert.

[Amber]

I would have been perfectly content to just stop after the lime ice cream - my taste for tart stuff has been out of control! The final plate sounds amazing, though. And so pretty. :)

[Smartypanties]

That looks so amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Dave Beaulieu]

Very cool. Have not made lime ice cream at home, but will give it a try.